This is a moment when I know my life has changed. It is 11:30 on a Monday, and I am very awake, having just returned from playing pool. In the last year (probably a bit more) my life has changed drastically. I have not only changed cities, but changed states. I have changed jobs (twice now), moved from a 2 bedroom apartment, to a 2 bedroom townhouse. Bought a puppy. Cut my hair. Changed my entire life. Last week, I was a nanny with no direction. This week, I am a student. On my way to using all the beautiful intelligence I have been gifted.
I can very honestly say that I have made more changes in the last year than I have in the 7 years since my mom died. And much of that was fear. But, I'm determined to move past all that, in into my real life. The life where I continue to be fun and spontaneous, but also smart and responsible. The life where I make choices that make me happy, instead of make me safe. Having just returned from a pool hall (where I've never been, and am btw HORRIBLE at) I sit here and am able to fully recognize the massive changes in my life. Perhaps it was the 2 beers. Or the warm weather. Or the snuggling dogs. But whatever it is, this is the moment. My life, in a matter of a few hours, has changed and I couldn't be more thrilled. I am working at a bakery, which I adore, I am studying engineering -- something I didn't really think I'd have the balls to do, and I am loving, living and exploring more than I ever have in my adult life.
I'm done with the regrets. Moving on from the mistakes. Trying to leave the emptiness and sadness behind. Big, wide, beautiful world : Here I Come. Please be ready.
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